[exte]我愛看恐怖片

唯有歸納整齣幻想劇情和外面的風雨交加是有關連的才能安慰迅速綻放而竭的機遇

記得先前自閉了好一段時間，經常處於離線狀態，很久沒有沉迷和在網路上的人聊天。
那天晚上正是颱風穿越台灣，風雨劇烈的階段，窗外肆虐的風雨聲讓我可以把音樂的音量開得和白天一樣。我一邊聽著r.e.m的leaving new york,盤算著半年後離開台北的計畫。不順利的事情很多，可是勇敢離我還是很遙遠。

其實最近和一個人很要好，總是有意無意的期待。所以我在差不多的時間，騎著紅色的魟魚漂流在各大城市之間，漫無目的預期著。清晨她提到了要一起看電影的邀請，雖然電影是個商業成分濃厚的恐怖片，內容大概和不停長的頭髮的屍體之類的有關係。去啊，一定去的啊，雖然高達拍了男性女性(THE MASCULINE-FEMININE)，雖然安東尼奧(Michelangelo Antonioni)逝去的消息發布了一段時間，雖然我連在新光的動畫影展都沒有、雖然電腦裡面還有愛情盛宴(Feast of Love)、生活的甜蜜(La dolce vita)，這一切都不重要，因為看電影這事件讓整個心酥軟了起來。這一刻我的內心膚淺，推翻了所有建立的原則，所有固執的鄙視蕩然無存，對任何事情的偏見消失大半。我好想看美髮屍阿。

『晚安。』我說

『.....非本人。』勿擾的免戰牌跟著升起

『妳是被她驅使也來玩的同事?』

『我是她男友』

『喔，久仰久仰』我實在想不到要怎麼接下去

這看起來很像旁式廣告的對白模式，不過就剛發生而已，某個連續下了兩天雨的晚上，跟著抽完三根dunhill後，再過七分鐘是清晨四點。終於，對面的燈熄了，窗外看去只有我一個人在這時候醒著，所以這是最後囉，再來我睡了之後全部的人都闔上眼了。

我的上一張專輯是它們的new advanture in Hi-Fi,那個時候她們充滿了實驗性質，年輕的口感創新，不出幾年，可以看到時間改變了她們對於用詞及編曲上的成熟和穩定，有人推斷背後的文化意義是在911之後的紐約情迷，我們可能永遠逃脫不了將這些東西套入計有的體驗記憶裡頭。儘管像是It's easier to leave than to be left behind, Leaving was never my proud卻依然讓人感傷。

Leaving New York
----R.E.M

It's quiet now, and what it brings, is everything
comes calling back, a brilliant night, I'm still awake
I looked ahead, I'm sure I saw you there.
You don't need me to tell you now, that nothing can compare

(chorus)
You might've laughed if I told you,
You might have hidden your frown.
You might've succeeded in changing me,
I might've been turned around.
It's easier to leave than to be left behind,
Leaving was never my proud,
Leaving New York never easy,
I saw the light fading out.

Now life is sweet, and what it brings
I tried to take.
the loneliness it wears me out,
it lies in wake.
and all I've lost, you're in my eyes,
shatter a necklace across your thighs
i might've lived my life in a dream
but i swear it, this is real
memories refuses, and it shatters like glass
mercurial future, forget the past,
but it's you, it's what I feel

(chorus)

You find it in your heart, it's pulling me apart,
You find it in your heart, it's pulling me apart.

I told you, forever, I love you, forever - continues during
I told you, forever, I love you, forever / last chorus.
I told you, forever, I love you, forever


(chorus)

Leaving New York never easy,
I saw the light fading out.